sadness followed

I want to remember them but I want to forget they have died -sometimes I can't find the part of me that separates my thinking of them as if they are still alive -but it doesn't matter because in thoughts it doesn't matter if they are dead or alive -thoughts are hard to leave knowing they are over but sometomes I forget -I met a man at the pool one day the next day after the pool we talked in the hot tub later that day he died I couldn't find his place in our short life together -Skip why were you in my life-who just died and who just before them -sadness followed these thoughts-go away life is best